I made a 93 on my science test. And I went to Cici's with a couple of friends for a Relay for Life benefit.
I even finished all of my homework before 10 pm. Which is really impressive, considering that I had quite a bit.
And then a guy on my hall helped me finish restringing my guitar, and I watched a movie with some people on my floor.
I know that's not a whole bunch of impressive, exactly, but it was so good. Really, really, really great, actually.
It's so nice to start kind of liking myself again. I haven't felt this good about myself since Christmas, I think. Or maybe even the beginning of the school year in August.
It is kind of shocking, in the best way possible, when people go out of their way to ask me if I want to hang out with them.
I know I always talk about how badly I feel for people who don't really have much of a self-esteem, and it's a little disconcerting to realize how little I think of myself sometimes. And to realize how unhappy I have been with who I am for quite some time.
But I think things are changing now. And I am really, really happy about it. Please keep me in your prayers - I know I have a long way to go.
Black Banjo concert this weekend at Legends and a hike on Saturday. MAYBE I'll even find the nerve to talk to the librarian who I am sooo infatuated with who doesn't even know I exist. And who doesn't know my name.
It's okay. I don't know his name either. Why, why, why! must I be so awkward around guys I don't know.
Especially when they are attractive.
I feel like the laws of the universe are working against me.
Fail, fail, fail. I love this librarian.
Time for sleep - class at 9:00.
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"Late have I loved you, O Beauty, so ancient and so new, late have I loved you! And behold, you were within me, and I was outside, and there I sought for you, and in my deformity I rushed into the well-formed things you have made." -St. Augustine
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